Surviving by judging less

Rucsi E. Sarbu
3 min readMar 17, 2021

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… or not at all. We live in a time where judging is almost a birthgiven right, or so it seams. And it is just like the saying: “divide and conquer”. Because that is exactly the point of creating a “them and us” narrative in the society. If we can battle each other, we are not taking responsibility or standing together. And if we are not standing united, we are easier to fall for the agenda of others.

We need to start accepting the fact, that there are multiple different perspectives out there. And they are all truths.

It’s not about me vs. you, or them vs. us. It’s rather about all of us. I assure you, we are 7–8 billion souls on Planet Earth right now. And there are just as many various mindsets, that derives from the individual journey we all have.

Standing united is not about thinking alike. It is about cohabiting with the different opinions, knowing, that we don’t have to convince each other about the truth, but rather accept we have different entrance points to a joint task, and we need to collaborate.

Photo by Tim Marshallon Unsplash

That’s easier said and done. Especially when we have so extreme opposite point of views. One could ask: “how can a carnivor and a vegan cohabit”. Or “how can a leftist and a rightist see eye to eye”, etc. But that’s exactly the thing. Instead of looking at the opposites, we look at what we have in common, and the rest will follow. This based on the universal idea: What we give energy to multiplies.

The negative aspect of this separatism is not seeing and understanding the context of everything. And it often creates a sense of injustice, therefore we judge. We don’t look behind the external reality and try to understand the internal causes — the internal energetic context. It goes both ways.

When we live from our own reality, we will often blame others, rather than looking at ourself and understanding, that in the encounter with others, there are feelings that arise within us, and really just reflect on others’ perception of reality. In other words, we often take over other people’s feelings and think it’s our own condition. We act for others and become part of the reality of others without understanding the deeper motives.

The positive thing about separatism is that it creates the ability to preserve oneself with others. Although, If we use separatism too much, we lose the ability to develop the collective aspect of life and to see the community. This is often what happens, when politics and rights are discussed. All included sides, in the heat of the discussion, forget to actually allow different perspectives, and fokus on the joint task.

Judging is to think that we know better, but the judgment says more about ourself than about what we have an opinion on. Therefore, be aware of not having an opinion on anything. For who knows what has gone before and what needs to be achieved by having different point of views. But just like an infant, allow ourselves to wonder, exploring and be curious.

So next time you meet another view than your own, consider, what you could have in common. This goes also for the “leaders” of the societies. Create a consious tribe and community around that specific common situation/issue/topic, etc.

And if there is nothing in common, then part with respect. Knowing that it all has its reasons and it’s a part of something bigger than us.

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Rucsi E. Sarbu

I bridge Spirituality & Science - assisting our human & soul to align. Follow my work on: https://rucsisarbu.com & https://memoras.org